Sometimes, when the topic of sexual harassment comes up in discussion, there are girls who tell me, like it's their "defense", that they surely never go out alone in the night and therefore never get harassed. I'm not sure whether to feel sad for or be angry at these girls. Believing that this saves you from getting harassed is not only very limeting of your own life and the things you are "allowed" to do, it also shows that you too have been force fed the unfortunatly common belief that it is a girl's own fault if she gets raped.
Now you're probably thinking something amongst the lines of "Absolutely not, I'm just telling girls to be careful!". Why should we have to be careful? Don't we have every right to walk around alone at night? In an ideal society, should we not be able to prance around bare naked if we wanted to, without being harassed?
Not that I'd want to walk around naked. It'd be awfully cold. And I'd be, you know, naked.
Blaming someone for the things other's do against her/him is plain stupid. It's not like being free is an invitation to violence. And this shit about women driving men mad with their slutty clothes, so that they can't control themselves, women asking for it... That's bullshit. Everyone can control themselves unless they have some sort of severe mental disorder. And if this is the case, it's still not the womans fault, it's the mental disorders. Furthermore, seriously, do you really believe that this is a world where the only ones that harass are men and everyone who gets harassed are women? And that it's always by some creepy stranger lurking in a bush?
The around eight times I've been sexually harassed (That's right!) I've been covering everything on my body but my lower arms and face with at least one of layer fabric. That's pretty far from slutty. I aslo constanly get to hear "But you dress really weird, don't you think people get provocated by that?" Well, they might, but that's not a reason to try and stick a finger up my cunt. Furthermore, seven of these eight times I was dressed like a pretty normal teen in a cute blouse, perhaps with a vest, belt or corset over it, and a fashionable skirt, shorts with tights under them or jeans. I get harassed a lot more when I look "normal". I think maybe my goth and lolita clothes scare everyone but the total psychos away... or perhaps they just view me as asexual and not worth bothering when wearing them.
And as for the alone at night, most of these times I was within an arms reach of at least three friends. And believe me, a lot of the times it wasn't in the middle of the night. Not even the evening, in some cases.
What I've been meaning to say with this is... I just want to be left alone by these creeps! My body does not belong to anyone but myself and it's nobody's right to have sex with me. People should not even be allowed to poke me against my will. Yet still, when I tell anyone what's happened to me, they often say: "But it's not that bad, right?" or "Perhaps you got it all wrong, perhaps he didn't mean to do that?".
All I want is to be left alone by these creeps, and actually listened to and believed by people. Obviously that is to much to ask for.